jamesolon

I don't know what day it is most days. I don't think I really care either. My days are all the same. I get up I take care of the kids, and I sit in y self pity for the day. I count down the time until nap time like some people count down the hours until they leave work. I know that if I'm asleep I don't have to deal with anything. I don't want to deal with anything. I'm losing interest in everything. Books, music, friends and family. I just can't be bothered. It's depression, I know that much. I take medicine for it, lots of medicine. It doesn't make me feel any better or any worse. It doesn't make me feel anything. I don't feel hopeless or anything like that, I just don't feel anything. I'm stuck in the mud with no desire to get out, it's almost as if I enjoy it. I don't I really don't. Im just overwhelmed by the thought of not being in the mud.